إلى لارا فابيان ومن يشد على يدها لتأتي ومن يركل ق... لتروح

 إذا بدا لارا تجي، تجي. وإذا بدا ما تجي انشالله عنا ما اجت وعقبال ما تاخد معها نواب المجلس كلن اللي بيعرفوا فرنسي واللي ما بيعرفوا،

وتاخد معها كمان اللي نازلين تنظير علينا وعلى وطنيتنا... ما شفت حدا منكن حرر غصن زيتون ولا دافع عن مظلوم ولا كشف مستور ولا نشر معلوم...

ومابعرف كيف الحكي عن لارا ومارا رح يغني فقير أو يعلم جاهل أو يحرر اسير...

في أولاد عم بتموت بحمص  وفي حريات عم تنتهك بمصر وبتونس وباليمن و بالعراق وبليبيا... و فلسطين هيديك المأساة الكبرى...
بس صوت لارا الرخيم يعلو فوق صوت كل هذه الغوغاء مش هيك؟؟

أما إذا كنتوا من دعاة نحنا ما دخلنا بغيرنا وخلي كل واحد يقلع شوكو بايدو لكن لخبركن إذا كان بعدكن ما بتعرفو، شو بدو يعرفكن فلا معرفة تعلو على معرفة الست لارا،

نحنا يا أشاوس منك إلو كل يوم عم ننسرق من مخلوقات عملناها بشر ورجعنا إنتخبناهن نواب ووزراء...

نحنا عايشين بالعتمي وبنصلي صلاة الغائب وصلاة الإستسقاء  ١٠٠٠ مرة تيجي الضو اللي مندفع حقو فاتورتين...

نحنا المجرم بنعملو مسؤول شي عن زنزانه بسجن روميه وشي عن وزارة وشي عن شعب وشي عن وطن... وإذا ما عملنا مسؤول بنفلتو...

والبريء عنا بنقتلو... بأساليب متميزه أكيد...
يا بنهبط بنايه على راسو، يا بنغطسو بطيارة وإذا راح تيصلي لربو بيلاقي الشيطان لاطيلو...

نحنا بناتنا وخياتنا واماتنا وصحفياتنا ومعلماتنا يا قابضاي منك إلو كل يوم عم بيتعرضوا لتحرشات وبهدلي وإذا ما قالولكن مش لأنو هيدي الإشياء ما عم بتصير بس لأنو انتو ما بدكن تسمعون...

إنتو ما بدكن تسمعوا غير صوتكن وصوت لارا اللي جاي تغني بعيد الحب ببلد إذا تنين حبوا بعضن ما فين يتزوجوا إلا بموافقة أقرع يا لابس عمة يا لابس سنسال...

و إذا ما وافقوا الشباب بدن العشاق يتشحشطوا على جزيرة متر بمتر مش معروف انكنا تركيه ولا يونانيه...

والماساة الأكبر إذا وافقوا لأنو فين يتزوجوا بس ما فين يشتروا بيت ببلدن وإذا اشتروا ما فين يعلموا ولادن...

وانشالله تضل الصحة منيحة لأنو اللي بيمرض بلبنان الموت استرلو وأشرفلو... 

بس أكيد كل هيدا مش مهم...

مش مهم إنو كل الإمم سبقتنا وإنو مستوى العلم عنا إنحدر لمستوى غسيل الدماغ وفصل البنات عن الولاد وفصل العقل عن الجمجمه...

المهم إنو لارا فابيان تجي...

والأهم إنو ما تجي لانو بدنا نسجل موقف إنو يابا نحنا حررنا القدس... و قاطعنا (كلمة قاطعنا هيدي كتير اساسيه إذا بتريدو سجلوها نوت عندكن)

وأهم شي، أهم شي، إنو لارا رح ترجع تجي، رغماً عن كل الأنوف التي قاطعت وانقطعت وهي تجعر وتطالب بكنسلت الحفله،

ولو ما نائب الشعب الأغر تحرك وإسترجع حقوق الشعب المهضومه ما كانت رجعت...

 وطبعاً في كل هذا الجدل البيزنطي السخيف إفادة...

إيه متل ما عم قلكن...

لأن من ورا لارا، أطال الله في أحبالها الصوتيه ورسائلها السلميه،

صرنا نعرف إنو الإرهابي هو اللي  بيقاطع حفله والخاين والعميل هو اللي بيواصل وبيحضر حفله!!!

 يعني شو بدي قلكن: عيب استحوا، مثلاً ؟ بلا هبلكن مش ناقصنا، مثلاً؟

ما فيني غير اني إستشهد (بتصرف) بإحدى روائع الفن الراقي وقول: اللي خلايا دماغو(بدل إمو اللي أن متأكده إنها منو براء) مسافرة ، رح يعمل حفلة !!!

ولا عزاء للتعبانين منا...

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10 Things u must CHANGE today!

Well here are we are again! This is another episode if what you can call the  10 series, in which I present 10 things I discover to be interesting, impressive, or inspiring. You can read a previous post from the 10 series here. Now, I have had this post drafted since Oct 15th, but never really had the heart, energy or even the words to finish it until today. I felt there was something missing but with the events that have happened lately: Jeita, Lebanon vs. Korea soccer game, Allouch vs. Shokr's boxing match, university student related incidences and elections, GEW, $32 million paid to STL, power blackouts across Lebanon, MEA strike, and of course the consistent dismissal of citizens rights to a law that protects them against violence, have all left me thinking that this post can not be put off any longer. So here they are, in no particular order, 10 things we can no longer afford to maintain.

1. Ignorance: We can no longer afford not to know. Not nowadays and not anymore! You cannot live in a certain part of the world, and not understand what laws govern it, and how they might impact you. You cannot open a bank account without learning what the regulations and fees required are, purchase a product online without reading the fine print, or marry someone without meeting the family or friends. Since we were all born with the cells, nerves and blood circulation that enables each of us to learn, ignorance is therefore a choice. I firmly believe that you have the right to freely choose anything you want; however, I also believe that your choice is flawed if you have not considered its implications before hand. Ignorance is costly because it results in giving up your free will and ability to decide on your own. Lack of information means that you hand over different aspects of your life to someone else more knowledgeable than you, like a bank, a politician, a firm, an airline, MTCtouch, Alfa, a cab driver, the car dealer and so on and so forth… That’s a lot of people/ organizations controlling what should be YOUR life. You do not need to transform yourself into a Mr. / Mrs. Know_it_all, but at least be aware and constantly search for information and assess its credibility prior to taking or holding back action.

2.  Indifference: There is nothing more irritating than carelessness. You might think that you are only one person, and so you cannot cause a lot of harm or result in any good. But you and I both know that this in not true. Ghandi, Fairuz, John Lenon, and your teacher, each one of those is one person and yet they influenced you and the world in more ways than I can list here. I am not saying that you go on hunger strike, but while simple acts of compassion or consideration cannot cause radical change, they can incrementally make the world around you a little bit better and make you a bit more integrated with your community around you. We are social beings after all, social being derived from society, and therefore it’s simply unnatural to go around disconnecting yourself from what goes around.

3.  Parroting: Parrots are beautiful creatures, but here’s a newsflash: YOU ARE A HUMAN BEING! Which means you have brain cells that can accumulate and analyze information better than any other being out there. So I suggest you use them. If you were intended to repeat everything you have heard or seen without thinking about it or adding value to it, then you would have had two wings and lots of colorful feathers, living in the amazons or in someone's living room eating crackers. Successful people are those who add value, to everything they do, but especially to things they say. Words travel fast, and are used to judge your character often.  It is crucial then that you understand the importance of thinking about what to say and when to say it before you say it. Repetition is a great tool for memorizing, but what future employers, employees, even life partners are looking for is someone who can think for his/herself, has valuable input to share and can contribute to positive change instead of repeat and mimic inherent ideologies and concepts.

 

4. Tautness and Conformity: Adhering to the rulebook and implementing policy and procedure to a T, without questioning them, breeds nothing but underdeveloped capacity. Because only through questioning, discovering, exploring and exposing yourself to people, cultures and concepts beyond your comfort zone will you learn and improve. You think you are just being a good citizen, student or employee, or you might be too scared or too indifferent to rock the boat, but what you are really doing is building your own cage by limiting yourself and settling for conditions that are either unjust or at best, in severe need of improvement. Remember: "The hope of a secure and livable world lies with disciplined nonconformists who are dedicated to justice, peace and brotherhood." Martin Luther King, Jr.

5. Making fun of others: No one cares if you are a celebrity judge on Celebrity Duets, and no one cares in what context, whether funny haha, a wink or a simple hand gesture; making fun of people, regardless of their condition, reflects nothing but poor taste and cruelty. Making a habit of such a behavior turns the human soul mean, disrespectful and borderline racist. Now, if you do not care about your image, or your personal development as an individual, then you better at least worry about Karma, because it does not play nice with bad boys and girls.

الزنبق ما بيحكي الريحان...

يا الله شو هل الليله....

برد والريح عم تتمايل...

تغزل من ميلي لميلي...

تحكي قصص وإتخايل...

***

قصة عن بنت بفستان...

وشال أحمر يغمرها...

البنت بتعبد لبنان...

بس هو  حابب يعذبها...

***

وطن أشكال ألوان...

بس لا تنقي ولا تستحلي...

الزنبق ما بيحكي الريحان...

والورد بس للسله...

***

سألته والإنسان؟

يعني ما إلو كلمه...

حب أرزة من لبنان...

ليش عمتغصبو عالشتله؟

***

كرمال شو...

خطاب رنان؟

منو الكذب بتملي...

***

و كرمال مين؟

مفتي ، أو مطران؟

بدن يقتلوا المحبه...

***

وبين السوأل والجواب...

طل خيالو من بعيد...

بقلبو مخبي فيروز...

بس عظامه من حديد...

***

بإيدو حامل كتاب...

راسم في لبنان جديد...

و شمس  تضوي عالأحباب...

لتدلن على يوم العيد...

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عتبنا على سمر كموج كبير

عند  ٧:٣٠ من مساء أمس، وقفت انتظر دخولي إلى قاعة الاسمبلي هول، ذلك الصرح العريق في الجامعة الأمريكة في بيروت... كنت انتظر دخولي إلى جنةٍ من الموسيقى العربيه والطرب الأصيل ترشدنا إليها سمر كموج، ضيفة برنامج زكي ناصيف للموسيقى.

أدخل القاعة مع صديقتي وتتبعنا صديقة ثالثة لاحقاً على أمل أن نسهر مع عمالقة الأغنية العربية سهرة ترد الروح كما يقال...  نقرأ برنامج الحفل وانجازات سمر و ننتظر... ولكن نفاجأ جميعاً أن انتظارنا ومحبتنا قد قوبلت بغناءٍ وعزفٍ ليس على مستوى كبار الطرب ولا على مستوى زكي ناصيف ولا مستوى الجامعة الأمريكية و بالتأكيد لم يكن على مستوى سمر...

لقد إفتقد العمل الإحساس الرهوف والتدريب المناسب اللذين يتطلبهما أداء أغاني  لفيروز و أم كلثوم، ووديع الصافي، وسيد درويش، وصباح فخري، وكثر غيرهم مع حفظ الالقاب طبعاً. الدليل تمثل بالأغلاط الفادحة في قول العرب والقفلات الموسيقيه، بالإضافة إلى نسيان العديد من كلمات الاغاني مما ادعى بعضاً من الجمهور الخروج من منتصف الحفل إحتجاجاً على هذا الأداء الغير متمكن...

صحيح أن الجمهور بمعظمه ليس خبيراً موسيقياً، ولكن جمهور هكذا حفلات وجمهور برنامج زكي ناصيف في الجامعة الأمريكية بالتحديد، جمهور سميع ومتذوق راقي للموسيقى الشرقية. لذا وجب احترامه وتقديره بتقديم عملٍ لا يقل جودةً وعراقة عما تعود عليه وعن ما تقدمه الجامعة الأميركية من برامج موسيقية رفيعة المستوى.

نحن من محبي سمر وعارفين بقدراتها... لذا العتب على قد المحبه و لأنو غلطة الشاطر بألف... نرجو منها التنبه والتحضير بشكل أفضل في المرات القادمة إحتراماً للجمهور ولفنها...

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Tripoli breaths fresh air for a day!

If you are in Lebanon and anywhere near one if it's large cities, you simply can not miss the traffic jams citizens and residents constantly face. In Beirut, specifically, things could not get any worse... no wait they could, they built a bridge in the middle of the highway! That said though, hope shines from northern Lebanon through the Carfree initiative. Now, let's not build castles in the sand, the initiative does not promise a solution, it's simply trying one. Specifically, a solution that was suggested previously by Architect Sandra Richani through her blog "Beirut the Fantastic". In her post, which you can check here, Richani analyses the problem, highlights its monetary cost and suggests, what I think, is a wonderful solution. Now, while the government still turns deaf ears and blind eyes toward anything that could develop this country, someone in Tripoli decided to listen and give it a try. Even if it is for a  day.

So the non-political initiative of Tripoli Carefree City will come to life on Nov 12 and 13. The planners of this event, want to stop traffic for 1 day in Tripoli and Mina and turn the city into a green space for its residents to enjoy. Accompanying the halt of traffic, are cultural activities and live performances from different artists and bands, all aiming at bringing awareness to environmental issues facing the city.  You can learn more about this great intiative by checking out their presentation, and show your support by liking their facebook page here, and following them on twitter here. 

Hopefully, this concept can be rolled out to other major cities in Lebanon, specially Beirut, making Sandra Richani's dream and ours a reality!

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Russell Peters: Best Ad for BO-18 & Party life in Lebanon ever!

Different people will form different opinions about this clip. There will be those who feel insulted, there will be those who will feel indifferent, and there will be those who will laugh their hearts out, just like i did. 

But in relevance to the Hope "motive", you might wonder where I see hope in this? Sure, I listened to Rusell make fun of our Arab accent, nationalities and behavior, but I also kept my eyes on the crowd. The audience had Arabs from almost every Arab country out there, and I saw them tearing up with laughter. Hope comes from the ability of laughing at ourselves, identifying that there is some truth to what Peters is saying, and not taking matter too seriously. 

Elsa Maxwell said: "Laugh at your troubles before someone else does". In doing so I guess, you have first identified your troubles, but also cut them down to size! Finding people who still have that ability and positivity is refreshing. I see hope, because I see individuals who are NOT indifferent to how Arabs, Lebanese included, are perceived world wide, nor do they want to be marked with traits such as terror and aggression. In their simple act of going to a stand up comedy show, and laughing at themselves, they are presenting a dignified refusal for those who wish to strip them from their humanty... And in that ladies and gentlemen... there is HOPE!

Have a great laugh! 

 

*Special thanks go to M.T. a friend of mine who shared this Youtube clip with me

*If you want to know more about Russel Peters just click here or visit his website

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Best Meat Sharma in FC - Beirut!

I know what you are thinking, but NO this is not a food review, and not a log of my quest to find the best meat shawrma in Beirut. It's far far better...

It's a funny scene fresh from my FB chat window last night...hope it brings you a few laughs...

That said, if you do know where one can find the best shawrma in Beirut do share! Don't be shy now...

• Friend: baddi shawarma la7meh, min 2ayn 2atyab shi ya dieter??  
• Me: i have no clue, bas it depends on where u are in beirut, i mean in hamra there is bibo's. bas usually i don't eat shawrma la7me so i can't really tell
• Friend: ah hehe.. neither do I!!!! bas ma ba3rif leih, 3am yotla3 3abeli el la7mi hal yawmayn :S  
• Friend: tayyeb ma drouri atyab shi, just somethin good.. am still at work...going home towarsd FB, if it helps.

Here I digress to ask an urging question....

• Me: what is FB? 

Had to ask coz the only FB I know is facebook!

• Friend: Furn el Chebbak.. lol. FC then 

NO COMMENT

• Me: i don't know walla 7ayaty, wait...

At this point, I thought an expert must intervene so I call another friend of mine who lives in Furn 2il Chibbak and knows top falafel and shawrma places... 

Phone rings, rings, rings some more....

• Me: wanted to ask an expert for u, coz she lives in FC but no answer. sorry. 

I bet she was asleep

• Friend: lool

I could never understand that one. Not sure what it stands for. Maybe "Laugh out out loud"... I guess when someone makes you laugh that hard, then he/ she can't keep the laugh inside! Hence the "out out" part...

• Friend: khalas, i will have to go with what is least risky... so I guess either I go to Bliss house, or on my way bwa22if 3ind Barbar
• Me: yeah. Although sara7a both are risky
• Friend: bas the risk goes down with the fact that they have high turnover, they sell, so inno balki the stuff are more new 

Or so she thinks!

• Friend: mom says fi wa7ad 7ad baytna 2al he's good, 2ismo LaLa Chicken. bas he's new and balki i get there w yotla3 ma fi

That last sentence validates all previous scientific research and brings us to our conclusion:

1. Girls can sure multi-task. They can think about where to have the best meat shawrma, figure out the best route to get there, extract this information from at least 3 different people, through different communication channels (mobile, FB chat, etc...), communicate blogs to other friends, and finish up work for the day!
2. Moms are special! That sentence sure reminded me of much mine is. After all, only a mom will suggest a place called "Lala Chicken" when her daughter wants meat shawrma!

P.S. I have never met my friend's mother but I am sure she is as adorable as my friend is... Sending both of them loads of love and respect. Also, special thanks goes out to my friend for allowing me to share her great sense of humor with the rest of you! and to my other friend for falling asleep in my time of need.


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My mom, Dolly Ghanem, and the 8 o'clock news

It’s 8 pm… and if you are Lebanese, you probably know what time it is. It’s time for the news. I can almost visualize my fellow countrymen and women. Circling around the TV, choosing a channel they think most credible, there is a huge selection to choose from - Future TV, Al Jadeed, LBC, NBN, MTV, MANAR… you name it, we watch it. Then there are the more eclectic among us; those might choose to watch Arabiya, Jazeera CNN, BBC… And then there are my parents, who have their own ritual. Every night at 8 pm my dad and mom alternate channels, my dad watches the news of one channel on one TV set, and my mom watches another news broadcast on another channel on another TV set (I must mention here that we have more than 1 TV set at home)

Tonight my mother has chosen to watch LBC’s news. And she chose well I must say. At exactly 8 pm, Dolly Ghanem, a well known Lebanese news anchor shines through our SHARP LCD screen, dressed in a lovely blue top looking like the royalty that she is… yes I am a HUGE FAN! She starts the news as usual with what’s going on next door... how many died, how many lied, how many are still on strike, how many call for further revolution, how many call to stop the revolution, how many went out to demand their freedom after prayers, how many prayers… The numbers grow, the bloodshed continues. I guess prayers are not being answered tonight!

Dolly’s face says it all really, and in case you or I missed it, the images remind you… the voices remind you, the weird feeling at the pit of your stomach reminds you.

Dolly then talks about the Bieber fever that has taken the Arab world by storm, all 22 countries of it… yes we have our own Bieber, he is none other than Al Qathafi, his actions, words, whereabouts seem to still top the headlines. One Libyan revolution’s solider talks about how they will search for the Libyan Bieber, find him and bring him to justice because according to him “GAME OVER”. I am not sure which game he meant: is it the lack of development? Is it getting rid of NATO before they turn Libya into another Iraq? Is it how to produce oil to benefit the Libyan people? Or is it relieving the Libyan people of the water crisis that looms ahead? Well I guess that’s a lot of games but the solider was very determined to highlight that the “Game is over”

It’s time for a break. The best ad of them all is that of Cheyef 7alak campaign. A very well informed Lebanese wozz on a scooter explains to us viewers that what makes a real chauffer are 2 things: “2il2ab wil Tikhmees”…translation: balancing a motorbike on one wheel and riding it to form a full circle like the number five in Arabic… My mom and I laugh… my mom runs to check on her cooking and meet my dad to discuss and analyze what they just saw and heard… they are cute when they go all political in the corridor.

I mute the TV and go back to reading my book: “In Search of Fatima: A Palestinian story”. I am in chapter 2, page 96: “But as February slipped into March with no signs of relief for our plight, hope that the Arab states were going to leap to our defense were dwindling fast…” My eyes roll to page 97:

Matters got worse and here was shooting in the streets in Tulkarm, the old people were bewildered by it. They remembered how it was in the Great War and thought it was happening all over again. “But even the Great War came to an end” they said and so will this…”

This is way too familiar. According to Dr. Ghada Karmi, this was back in January of 1948. Based on what I have seen so far from the 8 o’clock news tonight, not much have changed, in fact hardly anything has changed except for the hairstyles of news anchors. Bullets are still heard in the streets. Whether the streets are that of Tulkarm, Gaza, Hamra, Saida, Damscus, Allepo, Libya, or Yemen; our plight has not been relieved.

The break is over, I un-mute the TV and decide that Dolly deserves another chance, maybe next she will communicate hope, positivity, a resolution of some sort… Dolly, bless her soul does nothing of the sort. I don’t think she heard me.

Instead, Mrs. Ghanem informs that tomorrow is the first day of Eid Al Fitr. I don’t know if anyone noticed what happened next. Then again I could have imagined it, but I could have sworn that Dolly took a deep breath and then started talking about the Lebanese government.  Now frankly, to a Lebanese, that is by far the most agonizing of topics. Sometimes, I think we would all rather take bullets in the streets of Libya than have to listen to them or to any other Lebanese politician speak. Dolly shares a politician’s speech with us.  He talks and talks, and then he talks of the names the Americans gave him: “What were they?” he asks a reporter with humor, or humorless, then he utters: “uncontrollable” and “unpredictable” My mom turns to me as I write this and asks: “What did he say? Did he say unrespectable?” I laugh… I crack up actually. I correct her and laugh some more… it does not really matter what they call him… it doesn’t matter because he makes my mom laugh. I love it when my mom laughs… and in a way I almost emotionally connected with that politician because he makes my mom laugh… I connected with him for a split second… but then I came back to my senses!

The agony does not end. Dolly is playing rough tonight! She talks about who visited the prime minster and what they talked about and then… just when you think there will be less pain she mentions Walloudi’s name. She talks about whom Walloudi choose to congratulate and send regards to for the occasion of Eid 2il Fitr. Of course, Lebanon despite current events still carries some form of democracy in the Middle East and accordingly you would think that Walloudi should be free to congratulate and salute anyone he wants. But NO! Walloudi has done it again! He has turned the simple act of congratulating people during Eid into a news headline with one of his subliminal press releases that just keep everyone wondering… More gibberish… I don’t think it’s Dolly’s fault. Then Dolly speaks of Palestine, well she really has nothing to say… she just updates the rest of us about the death count, my heart cracks. Somalia is briefly mentioned, only because of $2 million donation not because more than $2 million people are starving to death. Someone bombed a mosque in Iraq…again!

Dolly talks some more, another break, another ad, I am still wondering about page 97… 

The news ends with Karla, I love Karla… I really do, I have nothing against her… she is just doing her job and it happens to be saying gibberish about the weather and other parts of the world. At least she looks a lot better and causes me no pain while she says it. Karla has no more gibberish to say. Camera zooms in on Dolly, she smiles back at me, great haircut, knock out blouse, looking like royalty and she asks my mom and I to join her tomorrow at the same time.

I look over to say something to my mom… she is not there! She left. I am not sure when she left. I am not sure if she even came back. I guess she knows, what Gahda Karmi and Dolly know… New news will not be broadcasted tonight! New news will just have to wait… we ALL have to wait and watch another news anchor, another day but at the same time! We cannot handle new news anyway, especially one of hopeful and positive nature!

Imagine what would happen, if there where no more bullets in the streets, if students in Gaza can walk to school instead of run for their lives, if you can protest in Hamra without being beaten half to death and chased out of your own country. Imagine if suddenly a group of investors’ decided to invest and develop the agriculture sector in Somalia. And I don’t want to even think what will happen if Egypt gets a decent president and if the only Americans in Iraq turn out to be just…tourists! And by far the most elaborate of imaginations is to imagine that a mom will send her son out to the grocery store and will not have to worry whether he will come back or not. I think I am giving myself ulcers just thinking about it…

You see, all this NEW news after all this old news CANNOT be good news! It’s bad for my health; it’s bad for yours… So we wait. I mean after all it’s only been 60 something years… For God’s sake people have some patience! 


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تحية إلى نزار

بعد إنقطاع لا بأس به عن الكتابة،

 أردت أن أحي نزار...

مش "نزار قباني" فذاك لا تكفيه مليون تحية...

لا! تحييتي لنزار حامي الحمى،

نزار الذي يزيد من فرصنا في بلدٍ يقتل الفرص...

نزارالذي يقدر ظروفنا في بلدٍ يزيدها سوءًا...

نزار ليس سياسياً ولا رجل أعمال...

نزار موظف في مؤسسة لبنانية مدري أجنبية...

متلنا أو متل ما يطمح الكتير منا.

بس على عكس كتير من الموظفين،

 نزار بحب وجعة الراس...

كرمال شو؟ 

والله ما بعرف!

اسألوا نزار...

عالأرجح نزار نفسه لايعرف...

ومع ذلك نزار حاضر للمساعدة،

جاهز للإجابة،

مستعد للخدمة...

أنا لا أعرف نزار شخصياً

أسمع عنه من غيري كأنني أسمع عن أسطورة،

لكنه موجود... ويجود...

لا أعرف نزار،

 ولكني أعرف أن نزار لا تسمع على لسانه عبارة : " أنا ما خصني"

ولا تراه يهز اكتافه ليشير أن الموضوع خرج من يده...

تحية إلى نزار...

لأنه صحيح لا يحل قضايا الشرق الأوسط،

ولا شكل الحكومه، ولم يكن يوماً رئيس البنك الدولي، 

ولكنه فسحة أمل في حياة الضائعين منا،

 الباحثين عن أجوبة و حلول في غابة المؤسسة اللبنانيه الأجنبية...

Mark & Munib and everything in between...

With everything going on these days, specifically in the Middle East, I can't help but wonder what Mark has to say? I wonder about Mark Zuckerberg because my brain cells can no longer visualize Al Kathafi and his offspring, Suzan and her drama, or the murderous crimes of "he who must not be named" and for sure my optical nerves can no longer see the constant failure of Lebanese politicians and law makers, nor can my stomach swallow the revolting lies of world leaders... No, no, Mark is different, he is special... he is not the most handsome and not the nicest... but the 27 year old has been by far among the most influential in the past few years.

This is a man, who according to Forbes magazine was invited to dine with Obama back in March of this year following the spread of revolutions in Tunisia, Egypt, Libya, and Yemen, had done something different alright! He has changed the face of human interaction as we know it and provided the ultimate tool needed to spark everything from revolutions to charity campaigns... 

But we all know this, what we don't know is

Going Home!

Can't go home at the moment ....:((( clashes in the area..Mwal3a el denia :(

That's what a friend from Palestine posted today as her facebook status at 2:13 pm. I look at the tiny clock at the corner of my laptop...it's 10:18 pm. I still haven't heard from her... I don't know if she arrived home or not.

Eventually, I know things will calm down. The dust will settle, the tear gas will disappear, the bullets will stop flying, the protesters will leave and the the dead or the wounded will be carried out of the streets...

But my friend will not

"هني" و"نحنا" والكوكا كولا دايت

صارت الساعة ٥:٥٦  صباحاً... سهرت كل الليل...

 كنت قد قررت أن أعمل على أوراقي المبعثرة في ١٢:٢٠ ما بعد منتصف الليل...

قررت ويا ريتني ما قررت...

بدأت ليلتي عند التلفاز وبرفقة صديقة كانت قد وعدت أن تتركني لأوراقي...

لا بل أقسمت أن لا تلهيني عن عملي... وكلنا نعلم ما يعني هذا النوع من القسم بيننانحن جنس حواء... يعني رح نلتهي ونص وخمسي...

على كل حال... مش هيدا موضوعنا... فبينما كنت بين أوراقي والماك (ابن الأبل) بين أضلعي... والكوكا كولا دايت بين أناملي (حلوه هي أناملي)

بدأ حديث بين بين فتاتين عن مشاريع الويكند وإذا بكلمة تنطرب لها أذني ويرقص لها قلبي تقال: "إيه رح روح عل المظاهرة"...

هنا لا شعورياً زحطت من لساني كلمة "وأنا كمان"... لأني فكرت بساذجتي الوطنية المعهودة أن فتاةً إبنة ١٨ ربيعاً و تلميذة جامعية في واحدة من أهم جامعة لبنان والشرق الأوسط أكيد ستود أن تعبر عن رأيها كمواطنة لبنانية...

ومنشان ما الحديث يطول طلع أنا عم احكي عن

عمو شوفير التاكسي...

"الله ينجحك يا رب" يقولها شوفير التاكسي بلكنةٍ تلطشية و أنا في طريقي لغرفتي الصغيرة في الحمرا... ترن كلمات "تاكسي تاكسي" من بعد دعائه...

ليته لم يدعي لي عمو شوفير التاكسي... فأي نجاحٍ هذا الذي يتمناه ونحن كما نحن، ونعاني ما نعاني...

أردت أن التفت وأقول له: "عمو لو بتعيرنا سكوتك شو بكون أحسن. مش ناقصة عيشتي واحد متل حضرتك يلطشني. بلا نجاح بلا بلوط..."ولكني لم أفعل...

عضضت على لساني ومشيت خوفاً على مشاعر عمو، الراعي الأول لحركة سرقة السياح الأجانب في شارع الحمرا.حرام! إن بعض الظن إثم...

ربما عمو لا يدري بما يحدث حولنا، فهو يقضي وقته على تلك الزاوية المقابلة لقهوة يونس وينادي طول النهار و الليل لراكب يستجيب... فكيف له أن يعلم بما يحصل... وأكيد مش عم بدور الراديو محافظةً على بطارية المرسيدس، فكيف من الممكن أن يدرك ما يجري...

هل علم عمو مثلاً قبل أن يدعي لي بالنجاح، بأننا فشلنا بتشكيل حكومة...

وأن أمريكا فشلت  في القضاء على الإرهاب...

وأن البشرية فشلت في حماية الحياة البحرية بعد أن القيت جثة بن لادن في البحر...

وأن العرب فشلوا في إستعادة صورتهم كناس اوادم، أو إستعادة حرياتهم، أو حق العودة، أو حتى غصن زيتون سرق منا...

وأن مهند فشل في إنقاذ سمر من شر نفسها، وأن بشير فشل في إنقاذ نهال من حزنٍ مؤكد...(لا تؤاخذوني فأصداء "العشق الممنوع" ما زالت تحاصرني...)

هل يعلم عمو عن

From Sassine Square, Lebanon walks... Part 2

 

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From Sassine Square, Lebanon walks...

It's 11:40 am and I had just walked out of my residence to find the first service willing to take me to Sassine Square in Ashrafieh. Five taxi drivers and 21 honks later, I found a cab. The driver was an old man, who for the entire way, looked baffled by the fact that I wanted to go to the square. "Sassine Square is closed”, he said. I answered, "I know". Now, he was more baffled, I knew that the square was closed and yet I decided to go! To go alone nonetheless. The more he looked at me in his mirror, the more I sank in my seat... "I must be crazy", I thought" for going to this rally alone..." But my soul persevered. I swallowed my anxiety and hint of fear and we drove to Sassine Square...

We passed by Sanayi3 gardens, and the young ladies and men, dressed in blue t-shirts calling people to join the march, signaled our proximity to the starting point...

Hamra Specials

Introducing the Lebanese metric system... of course 30 fash7'as later i still couldn't find the place... 


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هالبنت وهالشاب

سالتو: "بتحبني؟"

رد وقال: "أكيد"

سالتو: "طيب قديش بتحبني؟"

قال: "بحبك قد البحر وموجاتو

و الطير و غنياتو...

بحبك قد سنين القهر

ولبنان وعذابتو...

قد عمري الضايع  بالغربه

و قد العربي و صراعتو...

بحبك قد قطعة المي

والبنزين وغلاتو...

لك يا ريتو حبي نهر

متل العاصي وهدراتو...

لتسمعي حبي عن بعد شهر...

وتحسي بحلاتو...

حبي إلك متل الجمر..

مدفا بحضن رمادتو..

حبي إلك متل تونس،

حبي إلك متل مصر،

متل الشعب وكراماتو...

بس يا حبي

Rice & beans II: The Plan… خطة الفاصوليا تبدأ بحبة

• Do the dishes after finishing your Rice & Beans (فاصوليا و رز) lunch. I am the kind of person that can’t think if I have mess around me... Also if you wash your dish right away you won’t be tempted to pour another one.

• Support Libya, Bahrain, Yemen, and Jordan, even China in their quest for freedom. You can do so by dedicating a few words on your facebook status. As much as I appreciate you sharing the latest song of god knows which band with me, this is no time to think about ourselves. This is the time to make a difference and YES, you sharing and dedicating a few words can make a difference

Rice and Beans

My friend: I dreamt you wrote another blog the other day

I barely cracked a smile

My friend: Did u stop writing? You did, didn’t you?

Me: My mind is so jumbled up, I can’t put 2 words together.

My friend: Don’t stop writing…

I continue eating my fasolia w riz (rice and beans) lunch and she leaves a few minutes later.

As I swallowed (not chewed) down my lunch, I got thinking about the muddle clouding my mind, and I suddenly felt the need to gasp for air. I was overwhelmed by what’s going on around me, above me, inside of me. What happened in Lebanon in January, what emerged in Tunis and how things ended up in Egypt was exhausting. As an Arab, a Lebanese, a human, I feel frustrated, appalled, broken and drained… Then Libyans scream justice, Bahrainis get shot at the pearl round about and there are talks of earthquakes in other countries regionally and elsewhere (no need to list them you know who they are)

... سلام مربع للجدعان

شتان بين مصر ولبنان

عشان ريسكم مش زي ريسنا

و تونس بردو ليست بلبنان

أصل ريسنا  طيب وغلبان

المشكلة عندنا في الجدعان

عندنا الجدعان 

لهم شكل تاني

شكل ميش ولابد

مش إنساني

كل واحد فيهم ماسك وزارة

بس فاكر نفسو ماسك أمارة

وعشان يكتم خالص

على نفس بلدنا

الغلبان